Monday, February 24, 2014

Back to Being Myself

I recently finished Let's Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, and it got me thinking about what I'm doing here. I have been confused for awhile about what or how to write here and have been struggling to find my voice. 

I thought back to when I first started feeling this way and I realized it was when I randomly checked my email subscription list and found it had skyrocketed. Knowing that my poorly constructed posts about random nothingness were going out to so many people got to me. A form of stage fright, I guess. From that point on I was scared about what I was sending out. {Do people want to hear about this stupid stuff? Should I stop using contractions? Better watch those run on sentences!} (I've stopped counting how many mean comments I have gotten about my poor grammar and misspelled words.) I would write then rewrite over and over and then I got tired of whatever I was writing about and then deemed it too stupid to send out and move on the the next topic and then start the (vicious) cycle again. 

I am in no way saying I am as talented as Jenny Lawson. What I am saying is that it was refreshing to see her being herself and not being scared to write about whatever she wanted. It reminded be that it's ok to just be myself again and stop over thinking everything. Besides, my email subscription growth was directly related to my popular nail polish post. Those following along thinking that I post beauty tips on a regular basis are long gone now and my numbers are back in the non-scary level! 

What does this mean for you? Stay tuned for more random posts about daily minutia and what's going on inside this silly head of mine. And more contractions! 




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